The Ultimate List of Movie Bitches

The Ultimate List of Movie Bitches

Kathryn – Cruel Intentions

Our high school idol, coked-up Kathryn (Sarah Michelle Gellar) snorts her nose candy through a crucifix and tries to shag her hot step-brother, all while making her schoolgirl uniform look high-end. Plus, we love a girl who knows what she wants: TO GET LAID. Trust blonde bimbo Reese Witherspoon to screw it all up.

Debbie – Addams Family Values

Poor Debs (Joan Cusack). She just wanted a few nice things. What did she get for her troubles? A marriage to that potato, Uncle Fester, a MAL-I-BU BAR-BIE from her parents and, in the end, electrocuted. WHAT ABOUT DEBBIE?

Nancy – The Craft

Another misunderstood angel, Nancy (Fairuza Balk), just wanted to get out of her trailer trash hell and have a little magical fun. What happened? Bloody goody-two-shoes Sarah shit all over her plans and got her locked up in the booby hatch. Oh well, at least you look fierce, Nancy.

Rebecca & Gladys Leeman – Drop Dead Gorgeous

All Becky (Denise Richards) and Gladys (Kirstie Alley) wanted to do was win a little beauty pageant. Is that so bad? Even if it did mean bumping off the competition to do so. Good news: Becky DID win. Bad news: she got torched inside the belly of giant swan, while murderous mastermind Gladys is now some big Bertha’s bitch in the state pen.

Regina George – Mean Girls

Regina (Rachel McAdams) worked out before any of us that Lindsay Lohan is nothing but trouble. The bitch got her mowed down by a bus, and she ended up attending her prom in a spinal halo. But don’t cry for our bitchy Regina: a quick trip to TMZ now will tell you which of the two ended up on top. Sorry, Linds.

Amber – Clueless

Cher didn’t even do her assignment! How was Amber (Elisa Donovan) supposed to do hers?

Miranda Priestly – Devil Wears Prada

Miranda (Meryl Streep) pretty much redefined Head Bitch in Charge. That is all.

Courtney Shayne – Jawbreaker

“Satan in Heels” Shayne (Rose McGowan) wasn’t going to let something like an accidental murder fuck up her life. I mean, what about prom?

Shelley the Barracuda – First Wives Club

Though we loved “Princess Pelvis” Shelley (Sarah Jessica Parker), she made the fatal error of crossing Bette Midler. Sorry Shellz, you mess with the Bette, you get the horns.

Regina – Beethoven’s 2nd

So basically snappy dresser and Jersey girl Regina (Debi Mazar) was supposed to put her life on hold because two dogs wanted to fuck? Ridiculous. Debbie, we’re so sorry your beautiful jumpsuit got ruined in the name of dog sex.

Christy Masters – Romy & Michele’s High School Reunion

No sympathy for this one. Christy Masters (Julie Campbell) made our spirit animals Romy Michele sad while they were dressed in their amazing Madonna outfits. We hope your baby DID look like a monkey.

Gail Weathers – Scream

Journalist witch Gail (Courtney Cox) wrote the book on exploiting other people’s misery for your own fabulous gain. She’ll send you a copy!