On January 12, 2019, 20 years will have passed since Godney first blessed us with a holy collection of instant classics. While we wait for the world’s various governments to celebrate this anniversary as an official holiday, we here at INTO have decided to celebrate by ranking every song on Britney’s debut album from best to best.
Of course, such an undertaking is entirely subjective. Every single song on …Baby One More Time has been seared into the minds of young girls and fledgling gays everywhere since it first came out in 1999. Therefore, any attempt to rank each track is pointless. Indulge us though as we take a look back at a time when Britney Spears ruled the world, long before she made slaves of us all.
14. “I’ll Never Stop Loving You”
I stopped loving this bonus track a very long time ago.
13. “The Beat Goes On”
Fans are often quick to dismiss this early Cher cover, but if Beatney re-released it as a duet with the “Believe” singer now, it would instantly skyrocket to number one on this list and in our hearts too.
12. “I Will Still Love You” (ft. Don Philip)
Messy doesn’t even begin to describe the awkward reunion that Britney and Don Philip shared during the X Factor USA auditions in 2012, adding new and cringey layers of meaning to the line, “Time may take us apart, but I will still love you.”
11. “Autumn Goodbye”
Like pumpkin spice lattes, “Autumn Goodbye” is a basic yet enjoyable treat that everyone should enjoy exclusively between the months of September and December.
10. “E-Mail My Heart”
Remember that time Britney Spears invented Email? Of course you do, and it’s all thanks to this ballad that Techney herself once claimed “everyone can relate to.”
9. “From the Bottom of My Broken Heart”
It’s somewhat ironic that Britney ditched her sexy schoolgirl image in a promo directed by someone who was once referred to as “the Martin Scorsese of the erotic thriller.” Gregory Dark’s previous career in porn worried the label once news got out, but the wholesome song and video still remain Britney’s most innocent.
8. “Thinkin’ About You”
Honestly, I spend my days thinkin’ about Britney’s gorgeous deep register which comes to the fore in this chilled deep cut. Modernney could learn a lesson or two from this track.
7. “Soda Pop”
Whether you originally encountered “Soda Pop” on …Baby One More Time or the first Pokémon movie soundtrack, the fourth track on Britney’s debut fizzes with some reggae vibes and a not so subtle metaphor about male ejaculation.
6. “Deep In My Heart”
“Deep In My Heart” is joy personified and it was foolish of Jive Records to leave it off the original US track listing. Facts are facts, America.
5. “I Will Be There”
Imagine a world where the southern twang of “I Will Be There” propelled Britney to country stardom and she ended up recording a whole album full of Shania Twain inspired ditties. Y’all know you want it too.
Sweet like bubblegum, Britney’s second single slowed things down to a surprising degree back in 1999, and unfortunately, she rarely sings it live these days, but diehard purists will always have a soft spot for this gooey classic.
3. “(You Drive Me) Crazy”
If the single remix was included on the album, “Crazy” could have potentially taken the number one spot, because honestly, what song doesn’t benefit from a breakdown where Britney shouts “stop!”?
2. “Born to Make You Happy”
Not only is “Born To Make You Happy” the soundtrack to countless pillow fights worldwide, it’s also one of the best ballads that Britney has ever recorded, something which we Brits knew when we helped propel it to number one on the UK charts.
1. “…Baby One More Time”
Dun DUN DUN… You’re not surprised, we’re not surprised and anyone with ears shouldn’t be surprised either. This is the one true Mona Lisa of pop music and literally any other choice in the top spot just wouldn’t make sense. To suggest otherwise would be blasphemy against both Godney and the Holy Spearit combined.